I'm thinking about legally changing my name to "DEI Climate Change" so US law enforcement we'll have to purge all records referencing me.

BREAKING NEWS: Our top story tonight, Philadelphia police are seeking your help in identifying the man seen here in security footage allegedly putting a bop in the bop-shu-bop-shu-bop.

Feeling like going to 1400's, getting a Big Maximus and magna Gallico fricta.

That silly "How to irritate a citizen of every European country in 1 sentence" map is still doing the rounds, I see.

It is probably part of the (fairly bad) joke that in almost a decade of re-circulation, it still does not include Denmark, Wales, or Belgium.

I like my passwords like my potatoes: hashed and salted.

(This is terrible and I said it a long time ago, but thought Mastodon might enjoy it.)

#InfoSec
#BadJokes

"Yes, yes," said Bethan, sitting down glumly. "I know you don't. Rincewind, all the shops have been smashed open, there was a whole bunch of people across the street helping themselves to musical instruments, can you believe that?"
"Yeah," said Rincewind, picking up a knife and testing its blade thoughtfully. "Luters, I expect."
> Terry Pratchett, *The Light Fantastic*
#pTerry #DiscWorld #BadJokes

Too soon? No?

I have a joke about Stack Overflow but...
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you would say it's a duplicate.

What's a computer's favorite snack?
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Bits 'n' Bytes.

#scribesandmakers 23 puns part 2

Shirley, it is okay to make buns!

Shirley: Pork or leek?

What's a computer's favorite dance?
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The Algo-rhythm.

A hungry programmer orders a root beer float for dessert
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He hesitates and decides, "No, I'll have a root beer double".

I've got a really good UDP joke but...
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I'm not sure if you'll get it.

Why do programmers avoid beaches?
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They can't handle shells.

Writing TODO comments in your code
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just a fancy way of saying “future me’s problem.”

My code doesn’t have bugs
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it just develops unexpected features.

Greek cows favorite food is moo-saka.
#badjokes #dadjokes #badpuns #ilikecheese #moo

Was there a point where Kevin Feige was willing to call "Across the Spider-Verse" "Captain Marvel's OOPS! All Spider-Men"?

Being a programmer is like being a detective in a crime movie
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where you're both the criminal and the investigator.