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Right then. It seems lack of clarity on device rules was causing family conflict, so we've sat down as a family this morning to do the following:

1. Wrote down (individually) what we think the current rules are. Had a discussion.

2. Wrote down (individually) what we think the future rules should be. Had another discussion.

3. Collaboratively came up with rules that everyone could agree to. Signed them, and pinned to fridge.

@dajbelshaw Looks great, but one thing missing - what happens if someone breaks the rules?

@dajbelshaw Good luck. Something we’ve always struggled with too. Considering implementing a time bank for the youngest so that she can buy time on the iPad by completing offline activities, but not sure how to implement it.

@jamie It's a minefield, and what works with some kids / families doesn't work with others!

Have you read this? My wife and I found it really helpful:

goodreads.com/book/show/423488

@dajbelshaw Number 5 is a good one, even for us "adults".

The only time my mobile is upstairs is while I'm working in the office, otherwise it's downstairs and never comes in to the bedroom.

My partner, on the other hand, is utterly attached to her device, even after we get in bed.

She wonders why I can fall asleep so quickly and sleep so much better than her...

@gray Same. I've been on at my wife for *years* not to charge her phone by the bed.

The good thing about this process is that our kids asked her not to take her phone upstairs.

On Android, the 'Digital Wellbeing' stuff is really interesting, as it shows you how many times you unlocked your phone in a day, etc.

@dajbelshaw @gray I use my phone as an alarm clock, but I never use it in bed. I should probably just buy a proper alarm clock.

@dajbelshaw this looks nice! i respect the fact that you came up with these rules collaboratively. it’s much easier to follow rules that you had a hand in making.
the biggest thing for me is that everyone who made the rules follows them as well. it feels like my parents underlying philosophy is “do as a i say, not as i do.” assuming i interpreted your post correctly, appreciate that you choose to follow the same rules as your kids. i wish that was the situation in my house when i was younger.

@Spaceface16518 Well, indeed. Kids knowing where they stand makes relationships much easier 🙂

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