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About three weeks in, I'm seeing the results of shedding anticipatory grief.

* I'm sleeping.
* I don't have daily headaches.
* I can focus.
* I'm more present.
* Phone calls don't make me anxious. There's no, "oh boy, what's going on now..." feeling.

I'm reflecting on how taking care of my dad over the last 4 years affected my mental health.

Dementia is a tough one -- anticipatory grief is a huge weight.

Then there's the frequent hospitalizations, urinary tract infections, getting kicked out of facilities, etc.

It certainly had an effect on my mental health, my career, and my family.

Now that he's passed there are times I think about those years and I feel a lot of shame.

Not for taking care of him but how I responded to the stress.

i believe there's such a thing as objectively high quality code.

for teams, i think objective code quality less important than everyone agreeing about what they think is high quality code.